Closet Robbie Williams fan.

Hi, 
I have a confession to make...I'm a closet Robbie Williams fan. I realise with that statement I can renounce any claim to being cool. LOL, it's a good thing I'm too damn old to worry about whether or not I'm cool.





And of course here are some lyrics to go along with the song...

 "Come Undone"

So unimpressed, but so in awe
Such a saint, but such a whore
So self-aware, so full of shit
So indecisive, so adamant
I'm contemplating, thinkin' about thinkin'
It's overrated, just get another drink and

Watch me come undone
They're selling razor blades and mirrors in the street
I pray when I'm coming down, you'll be asleep
If I ever hurt you, your revenge will be so sweet
Because I'm scum, and I'm your son
I come undone
I come undone

So rock 'n' roll, so corporate suit
So damn ugly, so damn cute
So well-trained, so animal
So need your love, so fuck you all
I'm not scared of dying, I just don't want to
If I stop lying, I'll just disappoint you

Come undone
They're selling razor blades and mirrors in the street
Come undone
I pray when I'm coming down, you'll be asleep
Come undone
If I ever hurt you, your revenge will be so sweet
Because I'm scum, and I'm your son
I come undone

So write another ballad, mix it on a Wednesday
Sell it on a Thursday buy a yacht on Saturday
It's a love song, a love song
Do another interview, sing a bunch of lies
Tell about celebrities that I despise
And sing love songs, we sing love songs so sincere

So sincere

Come undone
They're selling razor blades and mirrors in the street
Come undone
I pray when I'm coming down, you'll be asleep
Come undone
The young pretend you're in the clouds above the sea
I come undone
I am scum
Love your son
You've gotta love your son
Come undone
You've gotta love you son
Come undone

Love your son
I am scum
I am scum
I am scum
I am scum
I am scum
I am scum

So I know it's about coke, however, I always think about when I'm in a depression, and how I live a duplicitous life. I'm so busy trying to convince everyone that I'm normal, even though I'm barely holding things together. Not to mention the self destructive behaviour I indulge in when I think "What the fuck! I may as well do whatever I like for a quick high, since everything is pretty pointless anyway." ...the flip side of which is: what damage am I doing to everyone around me by only considering myself.   



"Feel" 
Come on hold my hand,
I wanna contact the living.
Not sure I understand,
This role I’ve been given.

I sit and talk to god
And he just laughs at my plans,
My head speaks a language, I don’t understand.

(chorus)
I just wanna feel real love,
Feel the home that I live in.
’cause I got too much life,
Running through my veins, going to waste.

I don’t wanna die,
But I ain’t keen on living either.
Before I fall in love,
I’m preparing to leave her.
I scare myself to death,
That’s why I keep on running.
Before I’ve arrived, I can see myself coming.

(chorus)
I just wanna feel real love,
Feel the home that I live in.
’cause I got too much life,
Running through my veins, going to waste.

And I need to feel, real love
And a life ever after.
I cannot get enough.

(instrumental)

(chorus)
I just wanna feel real love,
Feel the home that I live in,
I got too much love,
Running through my veins, going to waste.

I just wanna feel real love,
In a life ever after
There’s a hole in my soul,
You can see it in my face, it’s a real big place.

(instrumental)

Come and hold my hand,
I wanna contact the living,
Not sure I understand,
This role I’ve been given

Not sure I understand.
Not sure I understand.
Not sure I understand.
Not sure I understand.

This song however just expresses my longing to experience all the things that I miss out on when I'm at the mercy of Bipolarity. It's not that I'm not loved, because I am...it's more that at times I'm unable to actually feel it, same as for the most part I've got everything that I need in life...The hitch is being able to actually connect to it emotionally. So I suppose it makes me feel that I'm missing out on half my life, and what a waste of the life I have within me.

Apart from all that Robbie has heaps of uplifting songs and nice high energy stuff which will get me bopping along and singing out of tune with my headphones on...so yes, I'm a closet fan.

Cheers Kate